There is nothing wrong with being shy. Being shy can sometimes be endearing and an appealing characteristic. HOWEVER, shyness should not be a domineering quality. If you are shy to the point that it interferes with developing new friendships, then it is more likely a crippling quality rather than appealing.
If you are a shy person, then have no fear because being shy is not intrinsic. It is not a characteristic that cannot be overcome. Everyone has the capacity and usually a desire to be out going and not so timid. Whether you feel like you are naturally introverted or not, your ability to be confident and lose your timidity in social settings exists; the matter at hand is nurturing that extroverted side residing within. (For a future topic, extroversion or being too out-going can be a hazard as well, so keep in mind a nice balance of confidence and reservation, at first, in the attempt to develop friendships is a good place to start.)
Guts. Convince yourself to be bold in environments with people you don't know; any situation, no matter how likely or unlikely you may think a friendship could result from that particular setting, is an opportunity to befriend another person. Keep an open mind about making friends. All humans are humans, which is apparent but just a statement to remind you that even people serving you at McDonald's are people that need and have friends and maybe even want new friends. A party, a trip to the bank, dinner at a restaurant, a trip to Walmart, etc. are all places that you have chances to interact with humans. A good place to start warming up your confidence and extroversion skills is just talking to strangers. The strangers don't have to be creepy men with dirty mustaches standing in parks watching children or anything. Just strike up a brief casual conversation with the teller at the bank or your server. Tell them a joke, pay them a compliment, or ask them how their day is. It just needs to be simple and unintrusive but you should try to instigate it.
Working on this confidence with strangers will make it easier in settings that feel more natural to find companionship. When you have practice with people you don't even know and possibly won't ever see again, it prepares you for interacting with someone at a party of a mutual friend that you could see again. You might even become friends with your server when you aren't even expecting it by just practicing being confident, out-going, and friendly. Friendships are often formed in unexpected ways and unexpected places.
Over a short period of time, your confidence will grow and your ability to conquer your shyness that impedes with developing new friends will be great.
That's all for now. Leave comments or suggestions for other topics. Thanks and good luck with the humans. ;)
Friday, February 5, 2010
There are things you probably already know: Life and people are often times unpredictable. However, we will attempt to give you some advice on how to go about making your life more enjoyable and more valuable by the people you try to befriend. If you are looking for better friends, read on. If you are looking to befriend somebody in particular, then read on. If anything you are looking for involves making new friendships or improving current friendships or maybe just anything within the realm of friendships, then read on...AND leave comments because we will then better know what to address.
This is just the beginning....hopefully of a beautiful friendship.
Making Friends starts soon.
Until the next post, we miss you already.